Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

What do you put your key on? A key chain.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

what did the person with yellow teeth and the person with white teeth have in common? they have a nose.

Three examples of how santa is gay 1) he says HO HO HO 2) he sneaks into your house at night from going down the chimney 3) he knows when u r sleeping and he knows when u r awake BONUS............. Better not pout, you better not cry, better watch out im telling u why.........SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN

Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

What's worse than a rapist? 2 rapists

What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

what has genitial warts? me

Q - What do you call a bunch of white people on a bench? A - The nba - Cool Bean

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? If the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are because there are no replacement light bulbs, the don't have transportation, and the nearest store is 10 miles away. In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

What would George Washington say if he were alive? "Help! im stuck in a coffin!"

A mormon walks into a bar. The Bartender says "What can I get you" The Mormon says "Sparkling Water please. In my religion we don't drink alcohol."

Why can't Sally use the swings? Because she has no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there?? ... Not Sally.

who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

How do you minimize the likelihood of theft? Take the derivative.

How do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

Why are roses red ? Ass in my face .

Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

Aiming with a revolver? That`s fucking overrated. with a heavy powerful revolver such as this one, you do not necessarily need to aim that well at the heart of your enemy in order to blow his brains out.

Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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