what does a jet and plane have in common? the letter "e"

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally Why can't Sally finish her ice cream She has no arms How do you fit Sally into a box? Put her in a blender. How do you get her out? A straw.

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What does a homeless guy do when he's hungry ? Nothing, he has no food.

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How do you get rid of herpes? You shoot up the cancer ward of a hospital.

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Kerry Katona becomes independent.

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What's gayer than Justin Beiber? The guy getting a blowjob from him! Kelvin Yang.

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what is the worst thing to find out about for wife she is your arm

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What do you call a kid with an eye-patch and a speech impediment? Names.

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The Holocaust is worse than any number of bee stings. Unless, of course, bees separated people of certain ethnic backgrounds from their families and killed them off bit by bit by stinging them.

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A Haiku It Is This One Is Kind Of Boring Now It's Time For Bed

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A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

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what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

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What's worse than a joke An ANTIJOKE!

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Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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Why did Isaac run from his mother? She tried to kill him because God said so. Christianity.

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Killing people is not illegal just ask a soldier

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If George Washington was the first president, and Barack Obama is the latest, how old is my grandma?

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my friend got in a car wreck,he lost his left arm and left leg. how is he now? Hes all right.

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How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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