Hey I just met you and this is crazy, I am pregnant and that's yo baby !

Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

joe paterno doesn't walk into a police station

Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

Kinky = using a feather Perverted = using the whole chicken Weird = using chicken bones Downright disgusting = all of the above, plus a cat

Why did the boy drop his icecream cone? Because of the shock of seeing his dead family.

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

A man in a wheelchair walks into a bar... ...wait a second.

What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?" Oh ya he had alzheimers.

What is both bold and brash? Fox

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

Does an albino chameleon turn different shades of white?

what's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? a Jew is a person and a pizza is a food

What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

Why did little Suzan fall of the swing? She has no arms. Knock,Knock Who's there? Not Suzan

A black person went into a store and paid full price for his tv

What's old and wrinkly? old people

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 beat the crap out of 8.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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