How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

Why did Rachel fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Rachel.

Whats worse then the Holocaust? Chlamydia.

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

I just threw up..In my pants.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

Canadians

A black guy and a jew walk into a country club, within minutes, they are told to leave and never come back in order to avoid being contaminated by the radioactive waste left by a landfill company cutting corners in safety regulations

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

So this guy is waiting for a heart transplant. He dies.

Vagina (Note: If you are gay just move on by.)

Roses are red Violets are blue TEST: Are roses red?

96

Why did the feminist complain? that's what they do

Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

I like my coffee how I like my women Without a penis

Do you know what a rhino really is? It is a really fat and oversized unicorn

why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

Whats the difference between a horse and glue? Nothing

What do you call a middle-aged Polish man on Skype? A lonely man.

What did the child molestor do? He went home and molested children.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...