A blond, a brunette, and a redhead got into a street fight. who won? The redhead because she had a gun.

Whats in your pants, might get caught in your zipper and you may hold it all day. your pocket.

Flawed genetics? I am just sad, but then again I am a crybaby, mind sharing a bit more with me? I mean you wont call me wont you? You are not keeping me a secret from anyone right?

Q. What do you say when a baby gets hit by a car? A. Lol fail

Why wouldn't they give Helen Keller a driver's liscense? Because she was a woman.

Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? A: "Here come the elephants over the hill!"

why did the blonde fall down a mineshaft? Beacuse the rapist needed somewhere to hide the body

Don't hate the cosplayer hate the... Actually, I lied, hate the cosplayer.

How do you kill batman? you stab him through the heart

im gay

Q: why wasn't the fan spinning? A: because it wasn't on. Duh....

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

What's the best way to piss off a feminist? R@pe her.

What did Canada say to America? We will not become apart of the United States where people are known as Fat Nascar lovin hicks!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? Nothing, chimneys can't talk!

Why were the black mans hands all sticky? He was helping orphans with arts and crafts

Jerry Sandusky and two other men are on a cruise ship, when it suddenly starts to sink. The first man says, "save the children!" The second man says, "screw the children!" Jerry Sandusky drowned.

Donald Duck walks into a drug store and asks the lady behind the counter for a bag of condoms. So the lady says, "Sure thing sir, would you like me to put that on your bill"? Donald says," THIT(Shit)NO, I'LL THUFFOCATE! (Suffocate)

A polar bear and a seal are sitting on an ice floe. The polar bear looks at the seal and says, "RAWRRRRRRRRRGGG" and then kills and eats him.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human languages, promptly shits on the floor and leaves...

What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

Why do Jew's have long noses? To dig out of the ashes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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