in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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hwhy did the monkey fall out of the tree? he got shot. why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? he was nailed to the first one.

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why did the girl slap joe? he had a boner.

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Two cows were in a feild, one said "moo" and the other said "i was going to say that!"

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What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

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POOP.....People Order Our Patties

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What do you call a Mexican that crossed the border. An Illegal Immigrant.

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What is square and grey? A grey square.

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A man walks into a bar. It's a fine establishment. He orders a couple of beers and takes a cab home like a responsible man would. He is then killed with a croquet mallet.

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What did the dyslexic boy get for Christmas? A laptop. And he was very happy.

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What's awesome and looks like a pumpkin? An awesome pumpkin.

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i am iron man running over fat kids in my van

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What do you call a black man that has just gotten out of jail? A former criminal who has served his time in prison and is now trying to redeem himself by becoming a respectable member of his community

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attempting to get back to his farm.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

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A woman walks in a confessional booth and proceeds to tell the priest about how she killed and ate her baby in a fit of hysteria because she is having issues dealing with her fresh divorce. The priest does not call 911.

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Me Chinese Me no joke Me die of cancer.

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Three blondes walk into a bar...and have a nice evening, until one of them pulls out a gun and murders everyone at the bar, i think she was schizophrenic or something.

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How many jewish people can you fit in a Volkswagen? depending on the class of car but a mid range SUV can seat up to seven.

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What do you call a group of geese? A giggle

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what do you get when you cross a puma and a turkey? A horrible abomination of life that begs to be killed.

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whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

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What did the chicken say to the.... nevermind

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops