What did the mother say to her child that was washing the dishes? "Sweep the floor."

Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

The sword that kills, the sword that gives life.

What did the starving african child get for his birthday Ebola

what did the boy say to the over weight girl your fat

Q: what is blue and has no legs A: A crippled boy painted blue

Your girlfriend.

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

one time at band camp there was a guy guess what he played? no one knows

Why was Justin Beiber Booed off the stage. Because I spelt his last name incorrectly.

how many dead babies can you fit into a bath tub i dont know i didnt get the chance to fill it up yet

i need a pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Antijokes...

What did the cat say to the dog? Communism

Two kiwis are in a fridge. Suddenly, the door opens, and one of them is pulled out by a human hand. He was never to be seen again.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Dinosaurs are extinct.

Why are people in Africa dying? because the majority of them have a lack of food and fresh water which effects their health.

How do you make the queen of england cry? You rape her violently.

What's the difference between a black man and a white man? The black man eats chicken.

What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

What is black and bad for your teeth? A cannon ball

Knock Knock. Who`s there? Hadooouuuuuuu! Hadou who? KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN! PERFECT!!! Perfect Bonus: 38493483948394839483984 Skill 0000000 Your life 0 Bonus 9001

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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