A man walks into an oven. He suffers severe burns and dies on a hospital bed

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Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she is dead.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

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Why didn't the chicken not get across the road? Cause it's head got shot off by some drunk asshole

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Do you believe in Santa? Cuz i don't. Kookaburra

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

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why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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Why did simran go over to maliyah and emma and andrea and alice and amanda and Every other fat ugly chicks house? Cause he cant fu*k anybody else!!!!!

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What did God do to help the little girl with terminal cancer? Nothing, God doesn't exist.

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A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

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Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

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So, a Vulcan walks into a bar... and he doesn't say anything, because Vulcan's suppress their emotions.

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Whats similar about an elephant and a plum? Theyre both gray, except for the plum

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Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

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What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

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CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

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Why did the jew ask for $10 back after he lent a boy $2? Because of inflation

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Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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Whats worse then any minority? The fact they still exist.

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why did the movie get bad reviews? it was a bad movie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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