what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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Why did the jewish family move? Their house burnt down. They lost everything and was tragic

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What did one blind person say to the other? Nothing. He is also mute.

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What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? one dead baby nailed to ten trees

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What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari? I ain't got a Ferrari in my car.

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Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? You would too if your name was Gnrwhaf

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Why did the man answer his cell phone at 3 AM in the morning? Because his phone was ringing and was probably waiting for an important phone call

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Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

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A man invites his Irish friend to his house. "Would you like something to drink?" the man asks. "Just kidding, we don't have any drinks." Later, they die of dehydration.

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Whats brown and sticky? - A brown stick.

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How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

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As they went down the hill Jack tripped on a rock, falling breaking many bones including his neck. In all the hysteria, Jill fell too, however she landed on a rock and now has severe dementia. This was all for a pail of water.

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What is fat and white? A polar bear with a glandular problem.

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

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Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing set? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops