What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Knock Knock Knock" "Knock knock Knock who?" "Just let me in, you twat, it's freezing out here!"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, did you know you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate replies, "Arrrgh, there's been a horrible nautical accident. Please call an ambulance immediately."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why did the Mexican take $20, because he found it on the ground

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the 16 year old black kid drop out of high school? He started a successful small business selling mixtapes.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's did the white man say to the black man? Howdy.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An Englishman, an American and a Frenchman are standing on the side of a cliff. The Englishman jumps off the cliff. The American also jumps off the cliff. He is followed by the Frenchman. Suicide and depression are major problems in today's world regardless of nationality.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock knock. Who's there? There's no need to ask this question due to the fact that most homes are built with peepholes nowadays.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

nicky finds it really hard to get it up.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A white man walks into a bar. He stabs 4 people and 1 escapes with extremem blood hemorages. his fanily later finds him bleeding on their family car. They take him to the hospital where he is put on life support. Later that night they are told there is nothing the doctors can do and the man slips away in his sleep. Who is to blame? The black guy in prison.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

knock knock who's there? Jehovah's witness GOOD BYE!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the baby say to the man? Babies can't talk ,the baby did not say anythingto the man!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you stop a black man drowning? Take your foot off his head

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the boy fall of of his bicycle? He was hit by an asteroid.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police The Police who? .The Police The Police who? ..The Police The Police who? ...The Police The Police who? ....The Police The Police who? .....The Police The Police who? ......The Police The Police who? .......The Police The Police who? ........The Police The Police who? .........The Police The Police who? ..........The Police The Police who? Forget this. *Gunshot*

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the Polish man say to his doctor? "Witam, doktorze. By?em kaszel z ostatnich kilku tygodni i jest wysypka na moim lewym ramieniu. Czy jest co? co mo?na zrobi?, aby mi pomóc?" I don't know what it means, either.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats from Hattersley? Someone who lives in Hattersley.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Hi there! As the Director of Anti-Joke, I would like to thank the users for their contributions so far. We are currently raising money in order to gradually end our dependence on advertisements for revenue. Your participation is so important to us, and in order to continue our service we request a minimum donation of $100 for continued use of the Anti-Joke website. Please submit your payment by the end of November 2012. All major credit cards are accepted, as is PayPal. Thank you again for your cooperation and understanding as we grow in our services.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What is worse then 10 babes nailed to a tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: You tell her an anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the boy with arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops