What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

thumb_up thumb_down +10

yo momma!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

thumb_up thumb_down +10

I would tell you a joke about a broken pencil, but it's pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

wanna hear a clean joke? bob took a bath with bubbles. wanna hear a dirty joke? bubbles was a man :) i heard this somewhere and it made me laugh :)

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the Golden Retriever say when asked about the meaning of life? woof.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is the difference between a peasant and a pheasant? One's a bird.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you stop an ice cream headache? Run in front of a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

thumb_up thumb_down +10

OMG THIS ACTUALLY WORKS! 1. Hold your breath for 2 mins 2. Die

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What would you do for a Klondike bar? Pay a reasonable sum of money.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did Jenny fall off her bike? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Jenny

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Hey babe, do you like going to sleep without shoes on? Because most people find it more comforting to remove footwear in order to rest and relax peacefully during bedtime.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did grandpa climb the phone pole with bananas in a backpack? He has a debilitating disease. He is slowly losing touch with reality.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man goes into a bar. He leaves drunk and beats his wife to death and burns the house and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why cant Helen Keller driver? She's a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops