So, Helen Keller walked into a bar....and then a stool, and then a counter, and then a table....

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Your mother is so obese that she has over the recommended daily calorie intake on a regular basis.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you define an unsatisfactory kitchen? It won't have a woman chained to the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

a man walked into a bar. the bartender asked why he was annoyed. he answered " people keep on telling this joke and I'm tired of the making me get drunk

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

thumb_up thumb_down -7

there once was a man, he was old, and he had one wish...do you wanna know that wish? Well i don't know it because he died two seconds ago from a heart attack. Oh Well...

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems have endings

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear Fuzzy wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy wuzzy wasn't very fuzzy, was he? No, because he had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did Susie fall off the monkey bars? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What has 389,236,587 arms, has rainbow colored fur, and fornicates on your front lawn? Absolutely nothing. That's pretty much physically impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Will you please answer one question for me? "Yes" Thank you. -walk away-

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A: Who are you? B: A random guy who walked into your house A: Oh sorry, I keep forgetting your name.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A Mexican and an African American are in a car, who is driving? The Mexican, while the African American rides in the passenger seat.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why doesn't the chicken cross the road Because his dad got ran over by a car when he crossed the road

thumb_up thumb_down -7

how do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed? pick up a parenting book ask him nicely try a time out not care because he's a kid and hes supposed to jump on beds?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

* pretend your an orphan Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -7

"What's long, black, and smelly?" "The unemployment line." Upon hearing his boss tell this joke, the accountant files a complaint with human resources and the boss must attend several work training classes to develop a better sense of racial awareness and compassion. The workplace soon becomes a much less threatening environment for all people.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Women's Soccer.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man walks up to a girl and says "Hello there" The girl doesn't respond because she has been deaf and blind for her entire life and doesn't know he is there. Potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the song that goes like, duh duh da duh duh duh da da do?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops