Q: How many Jewish people can fit in a four door sedan? A: 4, or possibly 5, depending on the sedan's optional seating, and depending on whether the gentleman are comfortable enough with each other to scoot closer to allow a 5th friend to join in.

Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

What did Osama Bin Laden Say to Obama when they met? Nothing Osama is Dead

knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

What's the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are $1.50 and deer nuts are under a buck.

Why is the melon having a wedding? Because it cantaloupe.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

A blonde walks into a bar. That's it.

do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

Why did they serve Swiss cheese at the church? It was lunchtime.

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Holy shit a talking Muffin."

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

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Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

My mother has great posture. She's paralyzed from the neck down.

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

A blonde walked into a hair salon. She got her hair dyed black, as she is sick and tired of jokes that scrutinize those with blonde hair.

You're so vein you are probably a tube that conveys blood from various parts of the body to the heart.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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