I have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Your Mom is so fat she's Fat

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I SWEAR TO GOD I'M NOT GAY! But my boyfriend is. Love you, Jeff.

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Why do they call you the interrup... SHUT UP!

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why did no one help him up? Because nobody liked him.

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Two homosexuals are making love in the kitchen. One leaves for a bit and says, "Dont finish without me." Upon returning, white goo is spattered across the floor. Concerned that the clumsily dropped icing may stain, they promptly clean it.

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Two ladies are walking down a road. One says, "It's freezing out here!" and then the other woman, who is a scientist, says "No it's not freezing. The freezing point of oxygen is -365.82 degrees F. So, unless it is actually that temperature outdoors, I highly doubt that it is freezing outside."

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Why didn't the girl paint her nails white? Because in this society, that would be considered racist.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? hit him with an axe

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his access to goods and services and his future options from birth.

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- Why an Asian crossed the road? - Because he wanted to.

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Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

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Your mother is so stupid that she has lived a very unfulfilling life due to her lack of education.

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Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun? Because leprechauns don't exist.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? Three bee stings. Whats worse than three bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Four bee stings.

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What did the korean say to the other korean. I don't know i dont speak korean.

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Q: A Mexican and a Jew are at a race. Who get hit first? A: None of them because they're from a different religion.

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

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Q-Why did the man fall out of the behemoth A- he had no legs

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Why did the TV not turn off? You need to use a remote.

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Brother : you see this hand Sister : yes Brother : if you dont leave ill slap you with it Sister : no you wont !SLAP!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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