You know what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Because you touch yourself.

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What did Jesus Christ say to John the Baptist? Nothing. He didn't exist.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Your momma is so fat because she ate alot!

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What smells like bananas but is invisible? Monkey farts

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A man walks into a bar with a frown. The bartender asks, "Why are you sad." "My wife got brutally raped then shot last night."

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So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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knock knock Who's there? The Police! Your under arrest.

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so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

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Rawan what are you looking at, stop reading this

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A man commands his dog to sit. However, his dog is poorly trained, so does not.

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Why did captain hook die? He wiped asss

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Why was the trash man feeling sad about his life? Because he had a mild case of depression to which his doctor recommended taking antidepressant pills.

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What is the worst joke to tell a Orphan? Knock Knock Who's there Not your parents ( Man than slams door in little girls face)

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Whats worse than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork

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1 white girl and 2 black men -TRAGIC

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Pretty vague, if I did not know you, Id conclude you where working for some mob syndicate or something.

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What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

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What did the oboe say to the trombone? SQUEEEEEEK

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 and 7 are non-living objects and cannot show fear or anger.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did the fungus leave the party? Truffle.

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Did u know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes by?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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