stephen hawking walks into a bar...

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The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

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What goes up a hill with four legs and comes down the hill with five? A creepy animal that grows legs when it goes down hills.

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So this chat, the talk on the phone was all a ruse?

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What do you call a mexican with a driveable lawnmower? Rather wealthy.. He must have a secure job to pay for a home with a lawn, and a lawnmower.

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your mothers so blonde she has yellow hair.

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What did the girl with cancer get for her birthday? Hairspray.

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What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

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What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

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What's better than a stick? A stone

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What would you do if I ripped your face off? Bleed to death.

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how did the fat man survive the plane crash? he didn't, he died like everyone else.

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Autism... is not funny at all, it is a serious issue in today's day and age and must be addressed and cured

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1: Knock Knock. 2: Who's there? 1: To. 2: To Who? 1: To whom.

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One day a black guy bought some fried chicken. The clerk said: Lol you guys always eat chicken! Lol said the black guy, yeah I am here a lot. Clerk: No I meant your kind of you know... I KNOW WHAT? Clerk: You guys at the studio next door! Oh, yeah, lol I almost thought you meant my skin color! Clerk: You fucking Negroes always thinking we are racist...

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http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

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The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas. A new vest and a puppy because his father got a promotion and a much higher pay raise.

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what did the blond do when her house was on fire? she called the fire department, because that would be the correct thing to do in such a situation.

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Women's Rights

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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two paraplegics walk into a bar. oh wait...

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What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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