Three men walk into a bar. The first guy bought two drinks, the second guy bought three drinks, can you guess what the third guy bought? A tazer.,

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Why did the cop pull over a black guy? The man was breaking the law by going 82 mph in a 70 mph zone, which resulted in a 100 doller fine. Oh and the cop was a racist.

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this is madness! Madness? no, nevah... THIS IS SPARTA!!!!!! NO, THIS IS PATRICK!!!

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A stipper walked into a club, though it was a golf club so she tripped and cracked her skull on it.The end.

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roses are red, violets are blue. hey.

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Where is Tampa Bay, Florida?

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What does NASCAR stand for? Non-athletic sport centered around rednecks.

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Two men walk into a bar. They get drunk.

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Why did the other Albino cross the road? He was running away from a witch doctor who was going to brutally murder him and steal his body parts.

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Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

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What does it mean if you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars? You both have five dollars

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Why doesnt Santa deliver presents to black children Because santa doesnt exist

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How did Mary fall off the swing? She got hit by a fridge.

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Q: pete and re-pete were on a boat, pete fell off. who was left? A: i dont know, but why did pete fall off in the first place, that dumb ass

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Go die in a hole.

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why did the Mexican eat a octopus because he was hungry would die if he didn't

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Why did the nun cry? 12 babies were killed under her care.

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What do you do when the Cubs win the world series? Turn the xbox off and go to bed.

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Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8-9-10.

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What do you call an underground train full of professors? It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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FRED CLEAN YOUR ROOM! Ok mom, I'm done "Nothing is cleaned" Well.. I tried

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Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because the weather report said there was a 90% chance of rain, and he didn't want to get his posh new coat wet on the way to the studio

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Why are friends like trees? If you hack at them repeatedly with an axe, they fall over.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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