What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere

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what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

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Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? A: Fish don't have vocal cords that allow them to speak in a way discernable by humans, and if they did, it would just sound garbled and bubbly due to their being underwater.

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Why did the little girl drop her ball? Because she was done playing with it.

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Me and my family won courtside tickets to the World Finals basketball game! ...WNBA...

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We found a cure for cancer. Death

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Q: What's worse than biting into and apple and finding a worm? A: being severely malnourished, thus physically inept to do most simple tasks

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

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Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

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What's white and gluey Glue

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am a dog.

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a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

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If a tree falls on a woman and there is no one around to hear it, she was probably lonely.

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

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Your flying on a canoe, and one of the wheels breaks off. How many pancakes does it take to fix it? Trick question there is a gorilla on board.

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A nun, a jew, and a black walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, a joke?"

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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Five little monkeys jumping on the bed One fell off and bumped his head Mama called the doctor an the doctor said, "I am calling Child Protection Services."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops