What do you call a black man playing golf? A golfer.

Q: Where does the queen of england live? A: This was the question I had to anwser to be able to post this joke.

How do you make a plumer sad? You kill his children.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because the amount of times people reused this joke on this site made her so annoyed much she wanted to hurt herself.

What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

A: What is faster than a speeding bullet? B: Light

Roses are red, Violets are blue, No, violets are VIOLET, That’s why they’re called “violets.” Edmund Spenser was an idiot.

Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

What's the difference between a hundred dead babies and a porsche? A porsche is a car.

I like it, I like it becuase it is cream

How do you stop a bus? Throw a little child in front of it. If the driver is a loaf of bread, this phrase isn't rather important.

Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

What did Super man say when the bullets didn't hurt him? That didn't hurt.

How do you blindfold an asian? With a blindfold.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Grandma used to say "you only die once." Years later, I learned the wisdom behind those words.

Whats fun about having sex with twenty six year olds? Theres twenty of them

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

i hate when your sentence doesn't end as you testicle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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