Why couldn't Jack and Jill climb the hill? Because they were bagels.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the blonde stay in the five-star hotel? She had enough money.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: Whats Worse Than 21 Dead Babies in a Trashbag? A: 1 Dead Baby In 21 Trashbags.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

what didn't I do when making this joke? Read and agree to the terms of service.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Ok,here's one, my brother can sometimes do it! Ok. Think of a number between 1 and 10 Add ten Add ten Add ten Add five Add five Take away your original number \~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\~\ _______________________________________ Is your number NOW, 40? Was your original number 6? Click thumbs up if that WAS your answer! ????????

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Women's Soccer.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If a llama walks into a jewelry store and a carrot has no feathers, then why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a car because chickens are simple creatures and don't understand the complex rules of the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

God is the English name given to a singular being in theistic and deistic religions who is either the sole deity in monotheism, or a single deity in polytheism. He (I use the term 'He' as it is the most common conception) is said to be omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent, and omnibenevolent. I highly doubt he will give you lemons.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If you give a mouse a cookie, he will probably eat it then have a heart attack due to the high level of sugar in the cookie

thumb_up thumb_down -9

So a blonde, brunete, and red head are all on the side of the road for prostitution. so a man walks up to the red head with money. she takes it and runs off. a man goes up to the bruenete and hands her money, but she also takes it and runs. so a man walks up to the blond with money and she says "wait...we get paid to do this?"

thumb_up thumb_down -9

All the planets are named after gods Ours is named after dirt....

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Chick Norris... Enough said

thumb_up thumb_down -9

How do you shock a child? Attach a metal pole to them while there is a storm

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the boy get from his grandmother on Christmas. Nothing she died on Thanksgiving.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: are you gay? A: maybe

thumb_up thumb_down -9

toby limbers is gonna follow in his uncles footsteps, the gay ones

thumb_up thumb_down -9

I was lying in bed looking at the stars in the sky What did i think to myself? Were the heck is the ceiling???

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag? A. One is white, plastic and dangerous to young children, the other is a plastic bag.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A bike.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why did the black guy cross the street? to get to the package store.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the shrimp refuse to share? Because he was a little shellfish.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There is a bus full of puppies and babies with a plane flying above it carrying 2 tons of explosives. The Bus arrives safely at its destination.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops