How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens have no sense of direction, he might have thought he was in wal-mart for all I care.

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Holocaust jokes are in bad taste, Anne Frankly I won't have any of it.

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"I see." said the blind man to his deaf son.

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roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

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Q: What did blue say to red? A: Let's make some purple

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What did the man say to the other man? I have a large rod

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

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Who are the faster readers? New Yorkers, they through 110 stories in 5 seconds

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What did the boy say 9+9 was? The Holocaust

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What's worse than finding a hair in lasagna? An earthworm crawling into your ear and feeding on your intestines.

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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How many dead babies would it take to plug the Fukushima Dai-Ichi nuclear power plant? None -- they are using thousands of litres of liquid glass coagulant instead.

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Everything.

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What separates man from animal? Divorce.

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Q: Whats red and circular? A: A red circle

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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")? When a picnic is postponed due to rain, or hired entertainment becomes unavailable at the last minute due to illness, or a book ends badly having started out well.

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Why was the boy laughing? Because

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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A young baby died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops