Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Jack and Jill went up the hill. It was in the middle of winter and they froze to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is the difference between Chuck Norris and a frog one wears pants and the Chuck Norris doesn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you blindfold a Chinese man? With a blindfold.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why do cats have eyes? So they can see.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Writing is hard Poems are strong I am muslim And this is a bomb.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down +21

why did the little girl fall off the swing she had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down +21

roses are red violets are blue tis poem makes no sense so screw you

thumb_up thumb_down +21

See now, that is because you consider yourself my submissive on a both concious and subconcious level, your body and mind wants me to take care of you. I could say it is because I read minds, but why read minds, when I can create them, why read the future, when you can create it. Finally, lets take a look into the word, nerve endings yes? Not nerve endings baby, its called Suggestion. But seriously though, lets put the word nerve endings on top of the word suggestions again there. Nerve endings, did I mention it works on your butt too? You see, usually you would say no, but you do know that now that I am your master, you do and enjoy as I say? See you baby. Moral: "Feel the grove, I control the way you move"

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is the difference between a park bench and a Mexican? The park bench can actually suport a family A. Woj

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Did you here about the Asian couple who had a stupid baby? They named him Sum Ting Wong

thumb_up thumb_down +21

I like touching my boobs

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Call the police to have him escorted off the boat for operating a large veichle under the influence of alcohol.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's worse than dropping your ice cream? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens have no sense of direction, he might have thought he was in wal-mart for all I care.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops