Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "He has a mild concussion."

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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What did the hedgehog say to the beaver? Nothing, they can't talk.

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A woman stopped making sandwiches.

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Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

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A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

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How do all Asians look? With their eyes.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. At least that's what I've heard, I'm blind.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

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What do you call an obese kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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Wha did the fireman say when he burnt his finger? Shit.

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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What is worse than writing a really terrible joke on anti-joke.com? Death.

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You know what's funny? You got AIDs

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What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

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What do you say when you see a flying donkey Wtf

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Once upon a time there was a tree. But it was just a tree, so it sat there. Then it didn't rain for a while, so the tree died. And nothing ever grew there again. The End

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What has two legs? Half a cat

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What is my cats favorite college? Harvard

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How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? None because alligators don't fly.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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