Two condoms walk into a gay bar. The people in the bar are perplexed that two inanimate objects are capable of locomotion.

What do you call a black man on a bike? Environmentally friendly.

Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

Why was the drunk person arrested? He said to a police officer "I'm gay, so shut up you b****."

What's more dangerous, a big rock or a small one? It doesn't matter. You can blame my mom for having me.

Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

My mom

What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

What do you call a red light A:soon to be green

your mom gave me head.....phones

What do you say if you wake up and see your television floating around at night? Say,"I should probably get to sleep. This is probably an effect of sleep deprivation."

What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pig, because even if a pig could learn karate its still a pig.

People say that shit don't stink But shit does stink It stinks like shit!

What do you call a fish without gills? Dead

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm gonna screw you and you don't have a clue !

What's black and white and red all over? A butler with a stab wound.

Never mail in your wished to a genie, he may be dyslexic.

Q: Why did'n the dirty man jump into the shower? A: Because he spotted the potential danger to jump into a slippery shower and proceeded with caution.

Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Well many scientists have theorized that a giant meteor hit the earth causing the extinction of most living things. Also if your christian : Dinosaurs never existed, evolution is the devils work, science is not the answer to the world's problems. Darwin was a foolish man, and thats that.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Beacause the destination he was trying to reach was across this road Notice how he tried This is because he got hit by a car but know one cares for him

Q: What did the prostitute ask the officer? A: Where were you stationed? I have a lot of respect for our boys in the Middle East.

What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

whats worst than a trashcan full of dead babies? A baby eating the dead babies.

what is the biggest lie in the whole world? -please drink responsibly

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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