Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

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what do you get when you cross a giraffe and an octopus an abomination

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One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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BLACK PEOPLE! (im black so its not racist)

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Yo mama so stupid, she should be worried about Alzheimer's disease.

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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what did Charlie Sheen say after he won a game of chess? I just won a game of chess!

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What is the meaning of life? Bill Gates: Windows Donald Trum: Money Some poor kid:luck and rich parents.

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why did the irishman need plastic surgery? because after the bear attack where there used to be a face there is now a gap

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How do you get rid of an STD? You give it to someone else.

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Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

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Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

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You need to trim these evergreens. Either they are getting low our my van is GROWING!

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Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

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What do you call a Mad Cow? Dead. Pst, Mr.Cobb if your reading this- Hola.

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man 1.have u sen my girl friend man 2. yes man 1. rely man 2. no man 1. dick

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what do you call a guy with no arms or legs and wearing red and white in the ocean? a dead person and someone needs to call the cops cause thats terrible.

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ASIAN- Look me in the eyes Normal human being- open them

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

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Anti pick up line: Boy: If I could re arrange the letters I would put U and I together. Girl: Oh really because if I could rearrange the letters I would put F and U together By Adam Chebali

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man? The black man eats chicken.

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What's grey and can't fly? A castle

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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