Two friends were hanging out. One of them asks, "what's that awful smell?" the other replies, "I AM NOT A ROBOT!"

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A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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Your mother is so fat because she inherited poor genes and dietary habits from her own parents.

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whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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Which is better; having a billion dollars or a trillion dollars? Trick Question, you aren't that rich.

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Why did the chIcken cross the road? To escape the holocaust.

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Whats round and bouncy? A bouncy ball

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why did the irishman need plastic surgery? because after the bear attack where there used to be a face there is now a gap

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Why was the little boy reluctant to approach his father? Because his father was a rotting corpse.

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Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

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how do you upset a black guy kill his family :)

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A seal walks into a club.

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.The chicken was very distressed and trying to get away from the angry mob that followed close behind it.The chicken was never seen again. If you see a distressed chicken please contact your local police station.

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Wake up in the morning feeling like... Helen Keller

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Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

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Why did it take the rabbit so long to enter the rabbithole? Because he was hit by a truck and lost a lot of blood.

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How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

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What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

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How do you stop the skunk from smelling, you rip it in half and bury the body therefore stopping the smells from escaping.

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1 tip for a flat belly so eating so much u fat bitch

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Why is it so hard to cook vegetables? The wheel chair won't fit in the oven.

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Whats the best thing about having sex with twenty eight year olds? There's twenty of them.

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! What's good for the goose Is good for the gander I'm Donald Trump!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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