Do you know what's funnier than 24? 25

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Three blind mice. See how they run. Into things.

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Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

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How do you kill Osama Bin Laden? Get The Navy Seals To Infiltrate his compound.

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What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

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Why was the interracial marriage unsuccessful? Because several social factors have challenged the couple as they live in a rural part of the South and interracial couples generally aren't as accepted in those areas as in progressive city centers.

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1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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-What did the old lady have for dinner? -Dementia

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am Jack Bauer, Where is the nuke?

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Q: A Mexican and a Jew are at a race. Who get hit first? A: None of them because they're from a different religion.

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Why would a baby cry? Because it's being put through a juicer.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side.

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone!

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1 + 1 = 2 If it was equal to 11 the problem would be impossible

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

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Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

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How do you define an unsatisfactory kitchen? It won't have a woman chained to the oven.

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What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener

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What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? Eating mud

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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