What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? Ten babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, There are so many different endings to this, it makes me just wanna Shoot Myself!

Why was the little Asian boy crying at the county fair? He had just watched his entire family get brutally crushed beneath the weight of the old ferris wheel as they went to get on. Never would he forget the painful screams of his mother as her blood splashed onto his white t-shirt. Never would he forget the police car ride to the foster home when it all sank in that they were truly gone. And never would he forget the abuse his new parents would inflict on him daily. But what would forever torment him most were those screams. Those persistent screams that woke him in the night until the day he died many, many years later.

Why did the cow go over the hill? He didn't. He was pinned and slaughtered in a private owned animal torture facility.

Two guys walk into a bar.The barmen says "sorry we are closed." So the two men reply "There isn't a closed sign on the door and the door was open so we assumed it was OK to come in and have a drink". The barman says "Sorry we are closed at the moment but come back in 20 minutes and I can serve you". So the men leave and come back for a drink in 25 minutes time.

What's black and white and red all over? A mime that got hit by a truck.

who's specky and stinks of shit? josh moran

Two gay men are seen walking down a street in Texas. Actually now that I think about it homosexuality is pretty much outlawed in Texas. Two gay men are thrown into a Texan Jail where they spend the rest of their lives, cold hungry and alone.

Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

NO ONE LIKES RANGAS

What did the cat say to the rabbit? Nothing, cats are incapable of human speech as far as scientists are concerned. Also, the mouse was having a bad day. Rutabaga.

If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

How does a black man get down the stairs? He walks.

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

What do you call a tree that grew in the middle of a road? Whatever type of tree it was.

1+1=2

"Roses are red, violets are blue," she explained to the color blind child, who was unable to understand the concept of color.

What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

What's worse than a bag of dead babies? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Jews.

9/11

there once was a man from Nantucket. I want to ride in a helicopter.

How do you make a baby stop crying for the rest of its life? Shoot it in the face.

what's worse than failing a test? having your house burnt down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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