how do you fit 100 jews in a mini ? two in the front, two in theback and 96 in the ash tray

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a blonde who can't read? an infant

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is worse then losing your remote? Falling off a cliff landing on a sharp rock and dying slowly.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob What do you call that same kid when he's at your doorstep? Matt What do you call that same kid when he's hanging in your room? I don't know, but you should stop calling him names.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What does Yoko Ono say while rehearsing her song before a concert? She gives directions to the band.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call 5 black people being killed in a car crash? A terrible incident

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What starts with F and ends with UCK? FUCK

thumb_up thumb_down +3

My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the blond woman sell her water skis? She was in a horrible accident and will never walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

thumb_up thumb_down +3

how does a a fat person dance? with his feet

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A boy walks up to a girl he finds attractive and says "You're body's kick'in! ... i mean...hey, do you know karate?"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than someone who isn't racist? A racist.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why are there so many peadofiles in the world? sexy kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than an hours detention? Gettind raped by a horse anally.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A: Ask me if I am an Orange. B: "Are you an Orange?" A: No.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo mama so ugly everybody died. The End.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

WNBA

thumb_up thumb_down +3

knock knock who`s there me oh come in

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops