an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

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A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

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What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

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What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

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What did the white guy say to the Mexican guy? Nothing he realize that the Mexican guy probably didn't speak English and he couldn't speak Spanish so conversing with this man would have been pointless.

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Knock knock Who's there Your Mother Come in

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Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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Roses are white, Violets are white, holy shit i can see the light.

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Q. How many blonds do you know? A. I don't know any blonds, but are you perhaps talking about blondes? Because if so, I still don't know any.

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roses are red violets are blue the sugar bowls empty so is your head

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Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur? A: Mega-saur-ass

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yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

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Why did the princess kiss the frog? She really wanted a wart.

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how do you make a plumer cry kill his family

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Why do eggs come in 12? because 13 is bad luck

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What do Ash Ketchum and Peter Francis Geraci have in common? Absolutely nothing.

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Why was the blonde fired from her job at the M&M's factory? Her Masters Degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the position she had.

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Why did the redneck leave his wife? To marry his daughter.

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Two baby seals walk into a club.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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