An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead

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How old was the baby when it took its first steps? That question is impossible to answer due to the fact the parents had an abortion and the fetus remained unborn.

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How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

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What do you call your mom after she brings a guy home from a bar? A very caring woman because she doesn't want him driving drunk.

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what do you do if you see a black man covered in hot greece on the floor of the bus shelter? call an ambulance...

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

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Why doesnt Santa deliver presents to black children Because santa doesnt exist

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Why did the woman fall off her bike?? Because someone threw a fridge at her!!!!!!

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My left foot has 6 toes, my right face has 8 Q-tips -Matt

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what do you call a black who stabbed your entire family? it all depends on what his name happens to be

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Have you seen Andrea Bocelli's new house? No. He hasn't either.

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Why did the boy fart on his sister? Because he was sitting on her, and happened to pass gas.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

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Proof that the Chicken came first than the Egg is all in the good book. It's called, The Dictionary!

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what has a huge nose and is jewish??? Henery Miller!!!!!

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Did you hear the joke about the pencil? Nevermind it was pointless.

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Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy, but heres my gamertag so party up maybe?

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What do you give a gay guy on his birthday? a invition to strait camp

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Lasers are red, Tasers are blue, and I will use them, to kill you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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