Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

What do you call a black doctor? Ehh...

What is worse-losing your phone or failing school? Apartheid

whats the difference between a ferrari in my garage, and a pile of dead babies in my garage. I do not have a ferrari but i do have a pile of dead babies

What do you call a man with no arms and half an eye? Larry -Jack Sparrow

What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

Whats a six letter name for black people? Friend.

knock knock whos there santa santa who .....long pause he doesnt exist now go shoot urself

Laugh.

Teacher- Pick the odd one out- Man, whale, bat, squirrel, frog Student- Whale. All others are found in Nebraska

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

knock, knock who's there? Dave. ....oh well dave's not here man.

shirt and blue, i call this one snow white, to score and seven years a jo, six samurai kageki, coral, 50 piece, specific frame, whats with that one, amy, hoption, smell my butt, smell my balls, smell my fart, smell my poop, urgay, pringles,

A cat walks into a bar, the bartender says "pussy?"

What do you get when you cross a helicopter, elephant, and a rhino? Heliphino

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well, I was amazed, I never knew they worked

what long green and bumpy? a pickle

knock knock who's there? ketchup ketchup who? better catchup with me!

what food wouldn't you take on holiday with you? any its all inclusive

Mum, "Why aren't you listening to me, are you deaf or something?" Son, (Silence)...

what would happen if american army lost their air supprt ? lmao

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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