some dude: weed is bad Other dude: then why do they prescribe it to people are you dumb or are you stupid

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

Why was Billy unhappy? He was molested by a black guy.

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

what do you call when a penis is inside a vagina? sex

A panhandler came up to me today and said he hadn't had a bite in weeks, so I gave him some change.

Wanna know my life in a nutshell? Well you can't. Life is an inanimate object an will therefore not fit inside anything, let alone a nutshell.

roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

a man rides on his horse to rohde island and back. he rode on Friday and returned on Friday. damn, that's one fat horse

Guess my favourite fruit. Peach.

His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

How do you know when your sister's on her period? Your dad's dick tastes like blood

Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

How many light bulbs does it take to garner an unnecessarily large crowd of a single ethnic group of people working together to simultaneously replace said light bulbs and uphold their cultural stereotypes? What the hell's a light bulb? I'm a culturally illiterate Amish man.

have u seen helen kellers dad? A: neither has she

why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

Do not use your phone, I repeat DO NOT USE YOUR PHONE, at this point we do not know enough, as for this kid, he is about two minutes from getting his ass locked in a nice prison, I told them he does not know anything, and I will make sure he does not squeal, you should be good, even if I got to take care of him.

What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

What has many legs, but can't walk? A dead spider.

A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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