how do you make a plumber cry? you kill his family!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

knock knock whos there i have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who Cream cheese

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I was eating a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke-'er-face

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Obama = ebola

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How is a monkey like a bicycle? They can both climb trees. Except for the bicycle.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A guy sitting at a bar was getting really impatient for his drink, so when the bartender asked if everything was fine, he yelled, "No, it's not! Where the f*** is my drink?!" The bartender replied, "I'm not sure what you're asking, 'cause I don't know what letters the asterisks are replacing."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How Do You Solve A Impossible Math Question? You Dont. cause its impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the difference between john madsen and a gay person. There isn't because john is gay

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's white, black and can't fly? Nothing important.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A boy walks up to a girl he finds attractive and says "You're body's kick'in! ... i mean...hey, do you know karate?"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

wenis

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what's funnier than the holocaust. If it happened again.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did Larry do when little Billys baseball crashed through his window? He raped and murdered little Billy for Larry has raped and murdered many children.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what did the blind man get for christmas? Cancer.....

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops