Knock, knock Whos there? docter doctor who? yes how did you know?

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What do you call a guy that just shit himself? Me

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Knock Knock Who's there Me Me who ME LET ME IN

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Mexicans don't use lightbulbs because they can't afford them.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am Jack Bauer, Where is the nuke?

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A man died. What was his name? Phil. His name was Phil.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow You were probably expecting a poem or something but no this is just a gardening fact

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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Why doesn't the little boy talk to his mom? Because she smells like barbecue sauce.

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All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

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Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

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Why would a baby cry? Because it's being put through a juicer.

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What's the different between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my penis up your butthole

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Why are Mexicans so good at jumping, swimming and running? They aren't. You're just racist.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting your balls chewed off by a rottweiler.

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause it wanted to. Why di the chicken cross the road? Cause it was stapled to the cow's face.

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Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

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What's the worst thing about gang rape? Going last.

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Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

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What do you say to a cat with a helmet on? Silly cat, you rhyme with hat but you shouldn't wear one.

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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