Why cant Hellen Keller read? Because shes dead!!!

A Chinese man... pulling another Chinese man in one of those carts behind him.

What did the chipmunk say to the nut? I'm gonna eat you.

What is black and white and red all over? A dalmation that was hacked to death with a machete.

Why is there trees? Because they change color... Oh yeah and for oxygen by Burflared

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

what has one ear, one leg, one eye, one arm, and is Jewish half a Jew

Holy sh** a talking muffin!!!

How many tickles can you give an octopus? Ten tickles

Have you ever had Ethiopian food?? Neither have they...

PICKLES

What is in your backyard and is stalking you? Corn

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks: dude, what happened to your eye? The man replies: abuse.

What did the father give to his daughter? AIDS.

Name a country that begins with the letter U A. True B. False C. All of the above D. None of the above

Q: Why did the kid get Christman presents in August? A: Because it was cheaper than chemotherapy.

So, a Vulcan walks into a bar... and he doesn't say anything, because Vulcan's suppress their emotions.

Why was the man burnt? Cause he fell in a fire

Q. What you call a Guy with no arms an no legs in the water? A. Bob

What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

when life gives you lemons, you should go to the hospital as you may have dyslexia

Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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