why did the mexican cross the road? to get to the lawn mowing shop becuase his wife has breast cancer, and he cant pay the bills sitting on his butt and getting a check from the government every month

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

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whats black, white, and bloody all over? i don't know, but we should stop making jokes and help it already.

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What did the cookie monster eat? Food

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What's the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are $1.50 and deer nuts are under a buck.

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Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

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Your mama's so hairy, she has to shave occasionally.

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Chris Brown can do no wrong. False he acquired several wrongs through his mistreatment of several women.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mother. Oh, hi Mom! Come in!

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm a dog.

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Why did Jimmy fall of a building without a paracute? Because he lost a bet.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was to fat. Why did the snake fall out of the tree? I don't know everything, Bitch!

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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Can I ask you a question? You just did

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Face...tastes like chicken!

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What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

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Have you seen Stevie wonders new house? Neither has he.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am colorblind I hate my life

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knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

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What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

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Q. What did the girl on drugs get for Easter? A. Down Syndromes Disease.

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Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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