roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

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Its crackers to slip a rozer and dropsey in snide.

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What did the ant do? I don't care you whore

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Why was a white man mowing his lawn ? The lawn was getting undesirably long which provoked the white man.

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What do you get when you drink water? Piss.

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What's Kanye West's main goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

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yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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what did the teacher say to the students when she was talking about the solar system The sun is very hot. At the core it is 15 million degrees Celsius or 27 million degrees Farenheit. Using a magnifying glass, we can see the very hot heat and the light of the sun. Please do not do that because it can hurt your eyes. This makes the light very bright and the heat is so hot it could start a fire.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I can not rhyme, Show me your tits

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What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

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You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

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Q: Whats the difference between a Jew and a Boy-scout A: Boy-scouts come back from camp

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What`s the best part about twenty-three year olds? there are twenty of them

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Asexuals aren't known for f***ing around.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house. knock knock..... who's there? the chicken

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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What do you call a white sheep with no legs? A cloud What do you call a black sheep with no legs? A shit.

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Q: You and a thousand other people are suddenly bursting in flames at a park, there is a big barrel of water just a few steps away from you, what do you do in order to save the people that truly matter? A: Stop drop and roll, duh!

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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how do you get a cat out of a tree? shoot it

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Mary had a little lamb, its heart was black as coal, it crept into her room one night and ate her f***ing soul

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So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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