Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

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If the blue man lives in the blue house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The blue man. He has made a good living with a high salary and has enough money to afford two houses.

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Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

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What happens when a blond walks into a bar She buys a drink

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A man walked into the woods... Sorry, I forgot the rest of the joke...

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

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How do you end a sentence

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Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? black people have more melanin in their skin causing it to pigment and turn black

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Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

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What do Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson have in common? The same first name.

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a lady says, " i cant stand this." Th guy next to her had his legs blown off and will never be able to stand again.

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Friend's sister: how many seconds are in 12 o'clock Friend: alot Friend's sister: WELL THEN 12 O'CLOCK IS A REWERJAJSBDKDJDHRJRJFHFKRJRIDBDKSBSDJ *slams door*

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I know where you live. No seriously im looking at you through your window. 80% of you just checked. 90% of you didnt realize i just ended that statement with a question mark. 100% of you just checked gotcha

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Q:What's colorful and waves like a flag? A: A flag.

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A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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What's red and bad for your teeth A brick

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What did the plane say to the other plane? Boy, those towers fall!

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Why did sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally

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What did the sailor say to the shore? Ur a beach!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? He wasn't: 9 was a dick.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Jews are human beings. Pizza is a type of food.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You just died, and I'm laughing at you and your extremely ugly face.

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Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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