Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Repeat. Yeah.

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Jack and Jill ran up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and died.

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What do you call a snake at a snail convention? A snake at a snail convention.

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An american, a french and a japanese walk into a bar. They are colleagues from the International University of Florida, used to go out together.

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When a mommy and a daddy love each other very much... and after being married for 39 years... They get divorced

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Whats the difference between a black guy and Luke Skywalker? Luke met his real father

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Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

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In Soviet Russia, there was a population of approx. 293,047,571 people. It was dissolved in 1991, it is now know as Russia or the Russian Federation.

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I scream, you scream, we all scream because we're getting murdered.

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Why is this website called anti joke.com? Because it has anti jokes.

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Jimmy went for a walk in the jungle, and he got lost!!

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Is your refrigerator running? If so, you are on drugs, and should see help.

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Why did the little girlbnot wake up? Because her mother smothered her in her sleep.

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Jack and Jeff went up a hill to fetch a pail of water, They both turned gay, and had some sex, and now they have HIV

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Q. how to kill the germ on a food. A. wash it with bleach.

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how do you wake up lady gaga? you throw her on the ground.

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Two peanuts were crossing a road. One was salted.

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what's the difference between a jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your nuts with a jew.

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How are friends and trees alike? They fall down when you hit them with an ax.

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DONT think about ELEPHANTS. Your thinking about elephants now.

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What happened to the guy who drank poison? he died.

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Man 1: my wife has lovley perfume. She smells like a peppermint cream. Man 2: Yeah, I know, I spent eight hours shagging her last night.

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What do you say to a whore with two black guys? How much an hour?

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A man walks into a bar with an MP5 and proceeds to fire thirteen bullets into a crowd of people, several unarmed bystanders attempt to disarm the gunman but they are promptly ordered to stay back or they too would be fired on, a witness reports gunfire coming from down the street to local emergency services and they arrive quickly, organising a perimeter around the bar, county sherriffs decide it would be safest to wait for a swat team, as reports indicated the gunman may have hostages, however the gunfire appears to have ceased an noone has entered or exited the building since police arrived on scene. As SWAT arrives on scene and media helicopters circle above, a person emerges from the bar and the gunman appears behind him, he shoots and kills the hostage and then turns the gun on himself, the death toll reached sixteen including the gunman and as many as fourteen people were injured. there was no clear motive to the massacre, but a search of his appartment indicated he was tired of one-liners on typical joke sites and felt his wife's betrayal with his best friend was too much to bare and he simply snapped after losing his job in the current economic situation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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