What is the sound of one hand clapping? I don't know you have a hand try it yourself lazy prick.

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Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

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Whats the difference between black people and white people? They're both people.

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on a planet, in a galaxy, far far away... you have cancer

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Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

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In this country, you gotta get the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, you get shot the F*** up at the end of Scarface.

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How do you fall off a building... JUMP.

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Why did Lisa spill her drink? Her plane crashed.

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What did one planet say to the other? Nothing. Space is a vacuum in which sound cannot propagate due to the absence of a matter or particle medium.

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Why did Suzy Fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? Phil.

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I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

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What's worse than seeing Levi naked? Cancer.

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Whats the sad thing about 4 black guys going over a cliff in a car? It was my car!

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A man walks into a bar and then, after a relatively short period of time, walks out of the bar.

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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life is like a box of chocolates, it sucks if you have diabetes

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A black person and a white person decide to have a race. Who won? The white person Don't be a racist.

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Q: what did i say when i crashed into the twin tower. A: nothing i was dead

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Q)what do you call a homless a man ?? A) dunno ask him what his name it (LOL RANDOMZZZ)

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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what did the girl say after she got hit by a bus, nothing she was dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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