A man lying in bed at night rolls over and starts rubbing his wife's back. She says, "Not tonight, honey, I have a headache." Her husband respected her wishes and went to sleep.

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

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why did the kitten not eat its food? because its face was stapled to the floor.

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A father and son get into a car crash. They go to the hospital and both the father and son are unconsciuos. The doctor comes in to the son's room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son. How could this happen if the dad is knocked out? It was a gay couple.

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One night, a man dreams that he is a bird that can fly into outer space. The next day the man finds out that his son is a homosexual.

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There were two elephants in a bathtub. One elephant says, "Hey, could you pass the soap." The other replies, "No soap, radio."

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cool

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How do you stop a black kid from hanging around in your back yard? Hang him in the front yard.

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Where do bees go to the bathroom? In the hive - they're incontinent.

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Yo mama's so fat that she has AIDS

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u r stupid! y? cuz u took the time 2 look at are jokes! haha lol

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I EAT YOUR SOUL. NOM NOM.

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What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Be sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

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Why does Michael J Fox have such good handwriting? Through years of hardwork, perseverance, and rehabilitation.

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This will be the least popular anti-joke. Dislike this joke.

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AntiJoke will not let me type this so I will add some spaces. N I G G E R.

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Why was David enjoying his cream of mushroom soup? Because David had spent the last 17 days eating flouescent light fix-ins.

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What happend to the girl in the corner? Idk that's why I asked!! :P

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my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

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How many types of pure breed dogs are there in the world? 701

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A comment saying "I don't think that's an anti-joke"

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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