Why do you want to know? And what did the censor get? Okay okay you are not boring nor stale nor anything, please increase the effect of this thing, its not working very well when I try to.

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Godzilla steps on a bar and orders a Scotch.

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Knock knock Who's there Isabelle Isabelle who? Is-a-bell necessary on a bike

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Depending on the amount of saliva you produce each lick the answer to this question varies species to species.

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roses are red violets are pink your nanas in the cowfeild with a bottle of stink... not really shes long gone.

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Two Naked men jump off a cliff. Three months later, an entire pack of Cub Scouts were enrolled in group therapy. It's ongoing.

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What did the jerk say to the Mexican? You are a Mexican

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"...."-Hellen Keller

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Boom! Splat! You'll never know.

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A blonde was told to go to the into the nearby swimming pool and sniff the Scratch-and-Sniff sticker on the bottom. Once at the bottom, she quickly realized that it was not a good idea and swam back to the surface.

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A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

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Wife, "Wake up... i think there's someone in the house, do something... go downstairs and have a look!" Husband, "Do it yourself." Wife, "You what? You can't expect a woman to fight off an intruder..." Husband, "You women wanted equal rights so here you go, do it yourself."

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what happened when a duck flew over the hunter during duck hunting season? the hunter shot at the bird, but fortunately, the hunter was nit very good so the duck flew back to his wife and children by the pond.

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What is green and has 4 wheels?... Grass, I lied about the wheels

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A batch of muffins is baking in an oven. One muffin says to another... Oh sorry, scratch that, they can't talk; they're f***ing muffins. (CSC)

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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Why did the two black men break into a bank with guns? It was being robbed by a white man and they were police officers.

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How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb? Obviously more than six because my bass meant is still dark.

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Whats the difference between a pizza and your opinion? I asked for the pizza

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Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

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Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

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Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

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A man walks into a bar and is shot in the face

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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