Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a canoe at him.

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Why did the pig cross the ocean? So he could be eaten by Americans.

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What color is the orange? Grey, I'm color blind.

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Why did the girl throw the clock out of the window? The clock was broken, and it was the only valuable object in her possession.

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25

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Roses are red Violets are too I am color blind How about you

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how do u wake kesha up? Answer:set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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Why was the man upset? Both sides of his pillow were warm.

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Jack and Jeff went up a hill to fetch a pail of water, They both turned gay, and had some sex, and now they have HIV

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MATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

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Kid hands Lebron a dollar, asks for change Lebron hands him back 4 quarters.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have amnesia HOW THE HELL DID I GET HERE?!?

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Why did the Mexican fall off of a cliff? He lost is ballence.

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*prepares this to get negative votes*

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What is green and fuzzy and when it falls from a tree, your dead? A pool table.

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Knock, Knock Wh- SWAT TEAM GET ON THE F****** GROUND!!!!!!!

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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Q. Whats the worst soccer team in the world. A. Ass-enal.

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How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

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Im 8 years old, sometimes I get sick, and I take medicine and it makes me feel better. My daughter has cancer.

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Don't you hate it when someone starts a sentence and doesnt fi...

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Me: Ask me if I'm an orange. You: Are you an orange? Me: No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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