I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Yo mama is so poor I saw her kicking a can down the street and asked her what she was doing? Her reply was: Kicking a can down the street. What did you think she was doing? Moving?

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock Knock! Who’s there? Alligator! I'm positively sure that Alligators are unable to talk, now please tell me who this is before I call the police.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why does Matt Daly do in his free time? it involves his finger and his own buttwhole

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you burn alot of calories? Set a fat kid on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Q. How do you wake up a sleeping rich man? A. By splashing acid in his face

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti-jokes are funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

knock knock go away

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I Have A Dog Named Woof Woof A Chicken Called Clucky A Cow Named Moo And A Pig Named Oink Lol Jks I Was Talking About My Wife

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

thumb_up thumb_down +25

what did the handicap, gimp kid get on his test? I cant tell you.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops