How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

Whats white and goes up? a confused snowflake

What do you call a black man eating a chair. I don't know and this is highly unlikely because chairs are inedible therefore this circumstance is impossible.

why did the baseball player strike out? he forgot the bat

Why did the black man get arrested? He didn't pay child support for his 12 bastard children

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

What do you get when you throw a white hat in the red sea? A wet hat.

why did the chicken cross the road? it was suicidal.

Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

There's a Mexican and a black guy in a car... Who's driving? The Cop!!!

A tiger walks into bar. He orders a drink and leaves. The tiger's name was Tony the tiger," It was just a man wearing a costume for the cereal company.

What's worse than a teacher yelling at you? The holocaust

What is the difference between a brick and a ginger? The entirety of their chemical make up and physical appearance.

Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

A Mexican walks into Taco Bell, because it is the only restaurant within walking distance of his workplace.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

what does a deer and grass have in common? they are both green but i lied about the deer

Did you know Hellen Keller had a swingset? No I didn't. Ya it was actually really nice.

Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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