How do you get a clown off a swing? Get a giant scorpion to rape him.

ask me if i am a tree. no.

YOU KNOW WHO ELSE LOVED AND NURTURED ME THROUGH MY CHILDHOOD YEARS? MY MOM.

What stinks of shit and has money. Smelly Mc Dee I lied about the money.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are red I'm colorblind

su algato es en fuego

What happens when a chicken with a goat have sex? nothing.

what smells like red paint, but tastes blue? my heroine OD panflets

Knock knock Who's there? Barack obama

Last week, one of my ex girlfriends called me. She said she had to tell me some bad news. "I don't know how to tell you this but I have AIDS. I really didn't know how to reply to that so I said the only thing I could say. "Yeah, I know."

Ask me if I'm a carrot Are you a carrot? No

Knock knock Who's there Orange and Banana Orange and Banana who? ... The man opened the door and saw a bowl of oranges and bananas.

Why was the asian bad at sex? Because he was 5 years old

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What's worse than find ten babies in a trash can? Find a baby in ten trash cans.

Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

What do the holocaust and new born babies have in common? Nothing. Except some babies are born in Germany.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

How do you blindfold an Asian person? With a blindfold

What's worse than breastfeeding a wolverine? Force-breastfeeding a wolverine.

What is worse than Jerry Sanduski? Nothing

Q: why couldn't anyone hear hellen keller when she fell off a cliff? A: she was mute.

How come the kid couldn't go to college Because he was black and couldn't afford it

what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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