''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

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knock knock? who's there Dave Come on in!!!!!

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Q: What did the psychopath dream about? A: An insane chimpanzee kicking his head off, or maybe something normal

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Q: Why do black people buy so many pairs of shoes? A: Because when they outgrow there old pair they need new shoes.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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why do leprecon's laugh when they run through the grass? because it tickel's their balls

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What is the opposite of Obama? Mitt Romney because he his white and a republican so all is good with him.

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Why are black people black? Because they're clearly not white.

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Two black men walk past a white man who recently hung himself from a tree. Oh the racist irony.

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What do you call cheese that's mine? My cheese

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How did Pablo get into America from Mexico? He drove here!

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Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

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Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

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If Chuck Norris has $5, and you have $5, Chuck Norris still has more money than you.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Gestapo

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Jimmy is taking a walk to Dairy Queen he walks into an allyway where he is shot with a 44 magnum and later dies in hospital his family morns

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2 guys walk into a bar the third one ducked then proceeded homeward where he murdered his whole family by ax

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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fish fishy caoimhin

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How do you kill a jew? Same way you would anyone

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What's red and green and goes 500 mph? A frog in a blender.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops