How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

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How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead.

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If atheism is a religion, then not collecting stamps is a hobby.

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if john has 400 cookies and eats 300 what does he have left? diabetes

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A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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A man walks into a bar. He is a diabetic and promptly goes into a coma after drinking.

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What do you call a Icelandic man? A guy who lives in a snowhouse with a elevator

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What's the difference between a black person and a park bench? Benches are inanimate objects while people are indeed carbon-based life forms.

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eh

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red I am High How about you?

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Which disney princess always stays old? Snow White

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "James" "James who?" "What the heck?You forgot me already?Its your bestfriend dude.Now let me in." ~Lil

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

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What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

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There was a curtain who sneezed and then asked you for a tissue. He was in a room with two chairs a coffee table and a 37 year old bookcase, why did he sneeze???? Because he had a cold!!????

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Your mom is so ugly, she suffers from severe depression and regularly contemplates suicide.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have alzheimer's Hey I just met you Coopn8r

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What do you call a kid with an eye-patch and a speech impediment? Names.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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What is wrong with being a black Jew? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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What did Robin do in between crime fighting? He had a paper route.

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How many plumbers does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Plumbers don't do that. Electricians do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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