When's the worst time to use skin moisturizer? When you're a burn victim.

What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

Q: How many different Pokèmon are there? A: Pokèmon aren't real.

what do you call a seagull that flies over the bay? -a seagull

What's round, has two hands, and tells time? Some fat guy I know, with a watch.

A devout Christian dies. Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Fags aren't allowed in Heaven.

The asian parent's look at their child and say in an angry voice. "Y U NO DOCTOR." The kid was amazed how uneducated they were in english after living in america for 10 years.

Whats bad about being a black jew? You have to sit in the back on the oven.............

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

Knock, knock. Whose there? A Mountain Lion wait...what

roses are red, violets are blue, I got pneumonia so now I am too

whats brown and half eaten? yeah an easter egg that a parent has given to there son/daughter before dinner

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

How do you get a baby out of the blender? Pour it

Say, "I have a really nice knock knock joke, but you have to start." To someone. They say knock knock You say who's there! and walk away.

COME HERE, POTTER!!!! NOW!!! Instead of agreeing to approach the source of the rather hostile summoning, Potter decided to sit down and eat a healthy vegetarian lunch of sausages and chips.

penis in the camel

in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

why was the female student failing out of school? because she made bad choices and never gave school her all.

What's heavier: a kilogramme of steel or a kilogramme of feathers? A kilogramme of steel, because steel is heavier than feathers.

How do you kill a black man There is many ways

what do u call a kid with autism? a autistic s.o.b or Hennon bart

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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