How can you tell your not italian? You aint no Guito!

LOL

whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

suzy took a bath with bubbles what?......... I'm sure bubbles is a nice guy

Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

What happened when the 16 year old told her mother she was pregnant? Her mother was extremely disappointed that her daughter did not stay faithful to an abstinent life but eventually became proud of the fact that she would soon be a grandmother.

A Lion walked into bar. He ordered a steak Because lions love meat.

Well, first of all, what I have overcome both mentally (trauma) and physically (lots of shit) is in the past, lets leave it there. Second yeah, I can basically shift my sense of left and right at will, meaning I can choose which arm to write with, and write things mirrored without even thinking about it, I can fool my senses basically, one second I struggle playing the piano because I have just trained with one, then I make my brain believe I have been practicing with both, its simple, but complicated to explain, while my ears are perfectly normal, I got two sets of balance nerves, it just gets more complicated from there.

Your mother is so fat, she struggles to control her weight even with dieting. Obesity and heart disease runs is in her mother's side of the family; she and everyone close to her is very concerned.

What do you do when its night time and you go downstairs and see your tv floating in the air? you say PUT IT DOWN N I G E R

The ability to live the life of a dead person.

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

your mom is so ugly, when she throws a boomerang it doesn't come back

What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside. A BMW doesn't have pricks on it's bodywork, for a multitude of reasons: - it would increase the coefficient of drag, causing an increase in fuel consumption - the pricks would fall foul of pedestrian safety regulations

This site is called anti-joke.com Because it is a donkey.

Q: Why did Suzie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock-knock? Who's there? Not Suzie.

Your mama is so fat, we are all seriously concerned about her health.

How do you get a slave to stop screaming from the rope he is hanging on? You stop messing around and you hang him already!

Help me I need to know how to cook a human fetus by tomorrow does anyone know any good recipes?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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