Why did Sally fall off the swing? I hit her with a shovel.

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joe: guess what. Bob: what. Joe: nothing I just wanted to talk

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I would have buttered my bread, but the pool was cold.

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What happen's when you give an alcoholic whiskey? He's an alcoholic, so he drinks it.

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Teacher: "Kenny, what is the biggest mammal on land?" Kenny: "A stranded whale."

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What did Zeus say to Hades? Nothing. Both are mythological beings created by the Greek civilization to explain why many things in the world happened, mostly because of a lack of modern science.

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A White, a Mexican, and a Chinese guy all take a boat to go exploring.

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what's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? a Jew is a person and a pizza is a food

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't cross it. He was pushed.

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Why is life so hard? Because god isn't real

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Doesn't matter. He was hit by a semi truck.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not your cheese.

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What do you call a midget cripple with cerebral palsy? Unfortunate

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A unicorn, a smart blonde, a dragon, and a hobo are in a maze who gets out first? The hobo. The other 3 don't exist. By Adam Chebali

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what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

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what did the little girl with cancer get for christmas? cancer

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Q: Whats 5+5 A:10

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michelangelo.

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Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

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An automobile mechanic busted an engine fuse. A prostitute had oral sex with a Marine. An Inuit hunter detonated a sea mammal with TNT. What do they all have in common? They all blew a seal.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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What is both bold and brash? Fox

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Your mother is so fat she sometimes eats a normal sized portion of food and does not feel satisfied

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops